Monday, Nov 28, 2022

Inspired by Rajasthan’s bid to rewrite history: Here are 5 other facts from India’s past that we could (should) change

Readers please note, any recourse to logic or fact is absolutely unnecessary here as long as we can sustain our nationalist pride through history.


The Rajasthan government has decided that henceforth history textbooks would say that  the Mughal ruler, Akbar was defeated by ruler of Mewar, Rana Pratap in the Battle of Haldighati. We are extremely inspired by their attempt to instill pride among the people of Rajasthan by sheer imagination and history alteration. As a follow up, we suggest some instances in history which can be rewritten to make us more proud as Indians and wipe out everything we dislike about the past.

Readers please note, any recourse to logic or fact is absolutely unnecessary here as long as we can sustain our nationalist pride through history.

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Alexander never managed to invade India

A popularly known historical belief is that Alexander the Great invaded India in the 4th century BC, defeating Raja Purushottama, better known as Porus, a local Hindu king in the Punjab region. Declaring this fact to be absolutely false, we want to suggest the schools to instead teach that it was Porus who had invaded Greece after defeating Alexander. He in fact did not stop at Greece alone, but rather managed to cross all of Europe.

Taj Mahal was built by a Hindu merchant

The pride of India and one of the seven wonders of the world, the Taj Mahal is falsely believed to have been built by Mughal emperor Shah Jahan. Rather, it was the creation of a local Hindu merchant in honour of his mistress. Of course, there was temple inside the structure.

Dara Shukoh defeated Aurangzeb

The much hated Mughal ruler Aurangzeb had actually never succeeded to the throne. It was his elder brother Dara Shukoh who came out victorious in the battle of succession. A believer of secularism and religious syncretism, he drew inspiration from Vedas and Upanishads. HIs indepth knowledge of Hindu scriptures provided him with the strength to get rid of his fanatic brother.

Bahadur Shah Zafar was never exiled

Mughal emperor Bahadur Shah Zafar was never actually exiled to Rangoon. Rather he and his forces managed to topple the British during the revolt of 1857. Zafar and his lineage have since been referred to as the “Emperors of India”, the country continue to pay homage and Nizami to the Mughal kings.


The East India Company did not win the Battle of Plassey

One of the most crucial battles deciding the fate of India was actually won by the Nawab of Bengal, Siraj ud-Daulah and not the East India Company. The Mughals are still the ruling powers in India and I wonder how most people are going to read this article since obviously English is not known here. The British did not get a taste of their beloved chicken tikka masala and the Kohinoor is definitely lying around somewhere in India. Since the East India Company never won India, naturally the Partition between India and Pakistan did not happen and the two governments are simply pretending to be foes in order to trick the rest of the world.

Please don’t take this seriously.

First published on: 09-02-2017 at 05:40:54 pm
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